The Daily Dose

Barack Obama caricature and Top Ten Boston Strong jokes

Overheard at Boston Square Market over the weekend: “The Chechens are coming! The Chechens are coming!” — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 Boston Strong Beats Bomber Terror jokes”

10. Haiku: Dzhokar Tsarnaev. His name is a joke to some. Evil to others.

9. Police: In Boston, law enforcement knows about how to catch suspected terrorists. Just force everyone to stay at home for a day, and then net the suspect in a landlocked boat.

8. Immigration: Immigration in America needs to be reformed. Instead of letting people become inculcated against the very country that grants people endless freedom and opportunity, the government should bribe the best and brightest immigrants to move from Holland to the United States.

7. Charles River: They tossed Osama Bin Laden into the North Arabian Sea. Why can’t they toss the Tsarnaev brothers into the Charles River?

6. Community: Seeing so many people come together to support Boston’s victims is so touching. It’s a true testament to the power of great suffering. Without it, the United States might devolve into the Ununited States.

5. Miranda: Everyone has the right to remain silent, except for the terrorist suspect in captivity, who can’t actually talk due to the injuries he sustained in his fire fights with law enforcement.

4. Military: Of course the Police won’t torture a terrorist suspect. That’s our job.

3. Patriot: It would be very unAmerican to squeeze Mr. Tsarnaev down to the size of a football and have the Patriots throw him, spike him, and kick him around for a few hours, and yet it would be so just.

2. Economics: The terrorists only win if they change our ways. So shutting down a major U.S. Metro area for 24 hours to hunt two guys with light arms in a nation full of gun owners, … that’s a victory for who again?

… and the #1 Boston Strong Beats Bomber Terror joke is:

1. Three Words: We Got Him.

Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.