The Daily Dose

Executive Cartoon and Top Ten Executive jokes

You can tell an executive man, but you can’t tell him much. — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 Executive jokes”

10. Bill Gates: The iconic software business leader is apparently so thrilled with giving away billions of dollars of his own money to charity, that he’s now going to be more active in helping out with the saddest of the bunch: Microsoft.

9. There is no executive bathroom. The one you think you know about is merely a distraction to avert your lowly mind. There are only executive luxury spas.

8. Two Words: Got Boss?

7. Wall Street: Despite pop culture claims to the contrary, greed is apparently still very good. If you don’t think so, just take a look at the cars and houses these executives are living in, and compared that to how much worse your car and house are today, compared to 5, 10, and 25 years ago.

6. Haiku: The executive always knows what he should say, if not what to do.

5. Politics: If business and politics really are separated, then why are so many business leaders successful politicians, and vice versa? .

4. Doubtful: Do you really think that your way up to the top is by leading a crazy circus? Neither did anyone who doubted Messrs. Barnum and Bailey.

3. In order to qualify for top executive management jobs, the candidate must demonstrate a proven ability to take credit for the work other people have done under his name in the org chart.

2. Q & A: Q: Why did the executive cross the road? A: It was safer than crossing the board.

… and the #1 Executive joke is:

1. Business Culture: It’s not so bad working as an executive, and it’s especially great if you don’t know how to do anything else.

Source: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.

Note: No actual executives or their pet underlings were experimented on, tortured, maimed, threatened, killed, harmed, harrassed or otherwise subjected to less than fabulously wealthy conditions during the production of these jokes. The business leadership cartoon presented in this edition was not subject to the broken or damaged economic systems currently crushing economies around the world. All executives herein did not approve or disapprove of being included in this productoin, and their names and identities may or may not have been morphed for editorial considerations. Any similarity between the executive names read, seen or misconstrued here and any actual polar vortex is completely laughable, unless you don’t get it, and if that’s the case then you should really have your mellon checked by a semi-professional.

Previously: Who Wants A Polar Pig