Syrian Summer Games editorial cartoon and Top 10 Syrian Civil War Sports jokes

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“The biggest hurdle of the Syrian Summer Games is Bashar al-Assad and his armed forces.” — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 Syrian Civil War Sports jokes”
10. Syrian Pentathlon: Protest, run, jump, javelin and shoot.
9. Haiku: Syrian athletes. They run faster than snipers, and they hate Assad.
8. The Syrian Civil War Sports 100 Meter dash involves crossing a heavily fortified border at the finish line.
7. Two words: Assad cheats.
6. President Bashar Assad is not just the butcher of Damascus. He is also heads the Syrian Summer Games Committee, and is fiercely leading the charge to break his father’s record.
5. The Syrian Summer Games and its daily coverage on TV affect so many people in and near Syria, it has an infectious spillover effect in Jordan, Israel, Lebanon and Turkey.
4. The relay race involves runners dressed like ancient Greek messengers, running back and forth between the UN and Damascus, until they all quit the race and let Assad keep up the mass slaughter of his own people.
3. The Syrian Civil War Sports Authority has ruled that it is perfectly legal for Free Syrian Army athletes to have to compete with better equipped Syrian Army troops who are allowed to shoot at the former.
2. In the Syrian Summer Games of 2012 headed by Bashar Assad, added a sport in honor of the Civil War : Dodge bomb.
… and the Syrian Civil War Sports joke is:
1. Usain Bolt might be the fastest man on Earth, but he avoids travel to Syria because he knows he can’t outrun the Syrian Civil War Sports Machine, Bashar “I’m the dictator so I win” Assad.
Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.