Bashar Assad Will Always Love You editorial cartoon and Top 10 Superstar jokes that kill
“Bashar Assad always enjoyed the vocal stylings of Whitney Houston, because as a young man he always dreamed of growing up to become a diva. Imagine his disappointment when he had to inherit a brutal dictatorship. No wonder he’s so angry.” — Yasha Harari
- “Top 10 Superstar jokes that kill”
- 10. Syria believes that children are the future … and that’s why Assad’s forces are killing as many of them as possible before they take over.
- 9. Whitney Houston died in a bathtub, causing Syrian President Bashar Assad to fear emulating her final act.
- 8. Haiku: Whitney Houston died. President Assad still lives. Murphy’s Law is cruel.
- 7. If only the Syrian dictator would have a bodyguard as charismatic and bad as Kevin Costner, fate could have rid the world of Assad before Whitney Houston left.
- 6. If a superstar dies of self-induced abuse, and a dictator thrives on abusing others until they die, which would your doctor order for your longevity?
- 5. Even a superstar can’t draw blood from a stone, but a third rate dictator with Russian firepower and no real political pressure can draw blood from thousands of people before anyone does anything to stop him.
- 4. Whitney Houston may have been a musical trailblazer for followers of the diva genre, but Bashar Assad has been blazing trails full of civilians for a solid year now even if he doesn’t have a lot of followers of the twitter genre.
- 3. Whitney Houston was a famous globetrotter. Bashar Assad is an infamous globetrotter. Neither of them played for the Harlem Globetrotters.
- 2. If you’re Bashar Assad, you can kill for thrills. If you’re Whitney Houston, you might have been killed by pills, but at least you weren’t an evil dictator.
- … and the #1 Superstar jokes that kill is:
- 1. Fame is a double-edged sword. Power is an arsenal of ordinance. Money is the fuel that keeps them both going, until the whole thing collapses.
- Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.