Bashar Assad Accepts The UN Plan
Assad editorial cartoon and Top 10 Syrian Diplomacy jokes
“In Syria, diplomacy is another word for kissing Assad’s ass while he kisses Asma’s ass.” — Yasha Harari
- “Top 10 Syrian Diplomacy jokes”
- 10. Reports are that Bashar Assad, the butcher of Syria, has respected his pact to respect the UN’s calls for a cease-fire. April Fool’s.
- 9. Hillary Clinton is displeased, and not surprised, that the Syrian regime has violated the UN’s 6-point plan for peace in Syria. Who better to diplomatically handle a liar disguised as a politician?
- 8. Society: Syrian snobs believe that the best way to transmit the displeasure to international condemnation of their support for the Syrian slaughter is to speak politely while giving the UN the proverbial finger.
- 7. Political Science: Syrians believe that political science will lead the way for their diplomatic efforts, by studying the number of people they can kill without being knocked out of power.
- 6. Healthcare: Off the record, senior Syrian diplomats are upset that all those Syrian protesters are being injured and killed, because it’s clogging up the hospitals and causing them to wait longer for their colonoscopies.
- 5. Haiku: The 6 point plan died, along with more Syrians. Diplomacy sucks.
- 4. Finance: Syrian Diplomats believe they can finance the suppression of the opponents to the Assad regime, as long as the dictator in Damascus can crush their hope and bullets can be bought for change.
- 3. Anger Management: Diplomacy in Syria is a lot a repeat offender stuck in anger management training: They’re never going to internalize actual change, and they only understand aggression.
- 2. Back-channels: In the art of Syrian wartime diplomacy, back-channels are another phrase for the dirty deeds done in the smoke-filled backrooms of political parlors. In other words, exchanging mountains of money for mass murder swept under the rug.
- … and the #1 Syrian Dictator joke is:
- 1. Q: How can you tell when Bashar Assad and his diplomats are lying? A: Their hearts are beating.
- Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.